Whenever someone starts a statement with, Let me tell you the kind of guy I am, that is a great time to start sawing your own head off.
I'm no longer afraid of not making enough mistakes.
When you break life down, it's about 100% time management.
Having kids means there's always someone around to blame your fart on.
There's a big difference between poll workers and pole workers. Sadly.
Cowboy boots with a suit? You're a rough, tough businessman. Chaps with a bow tie? You're in the rough, tough man business.