I've often been accused of being the comic's comic. It's a bad business model when your fans are the people who get in free.
Dana GouldA lot of people have a particular song that, no matter their mood, turns them on. With me, it's Eleanor Rigby.
Dana GouldSomewhere, there's someone who's masturbation ritual ends with them setting up ventriloquist dummies facing the bed. I mean, someone else.
Dana Gould