Drum Competitions are called such because no one wants to win the big Beat Off.

I'm of the generation of kids where the G.I. Joe's developed Kung Fu Grip right around the same time I did.

I don't want to say my mom is late on trends, but this morning she said, Have a shagadelic day, sweetheart.

Strap On spelled backwards is No Parts. Just sayin'.

My father hauled boxes so I could get an education and earn enough money to pay someone to make me lift weights.

If I had a dreamcatcher when I was thirteen, it would have spent many long days in the dryer.

They say that cats are the only animal that can sit in your lap and ignore you. To which I say: you've never been to the Spearmint Rhino.