Drum Competitions are called such because no one wants to win the big Beat Off.

If Jesus was a baby, there was a point, on that Holiest of nights, in that Holiest of mangers, where he made a big, Holy load.

Take away the robots and the special effects, and Star Wars is just the simple story of a group of friends planning a terrorist attack.

We broke up, and my first reaction was 'Fine - I've been through this too many times. I can't change your mind. I can't live your life for you. You're gone in your direction. I'm going to pick up; I'm going to go in my direction. I'm not going to live in the past. I'm not going to embrace the pain. You go, I'll go, and that will be it.' And I felt that way for an hour and 10 minutes.

I tried synchronized swimming, but felt, over time, I was just going through the motions.

Whoever coined the phrase, killing two birds with one stone, not only hated birds but also thought we needed to conserve stones.

When all the people covered in tattoos turn about 70 years old, they're going to look like a strange race of melting clowns.