You rarely get a convincing lecture on playing to your strength from a bald guy with a ponytail.

A giant python was discovered in Florida. Spooky news for a state that derives half it's income from a giant mouse.

What's a farmer's market without some guy singing Here Comes The Sun in a way that makes you wish the sun would stop coming up.

Corn is the only food you hold like corn.

If I masturbate while Googling myself, which part is more redundant?

I don't mind being alone when I'm surrounded by people, I just hate being alone when I'm alone.

Love is like pancreatitis; it starts off slow, then builds in intensity until you become consumed and develop violent cramps.