What's a farmer's market without some guy singing Here Comes The Sun in a way that makes you wish the sun would stop coming up.

I feel sorry for high school teams still named the Cougars. Now what does the coach say? Get out there and play like horny old ladies!

Approached literally, there's but a hair's difference between You'd better not pout, you'd better not cry, and Don't scream.

My fantasy football team got mixed up in another fantasy and now they're stuck on a pirate ship with a chick in a Catwoman suit.

Centuries ago, human beings created marriage. Later, they looked to the sky and dreamt of traveling to the moon. Coincidence?

They say that God is in the details. Then again, they also say that the Devil is in the details. Boy, talk about awkward.

Showing joy by jumping up and down and clapping goes away at some point between pre-school and being old enough to go to orgies.