To me 30 isn't old. But it's definitely the beginning of no longer young. Because you notice little subtle things happen to you. You'll be in your car driving around listening to the radio and hear stuff like, That's was an oldie from The Clash.

The Republican Party is the party of Eddie Haskell and the principal from Ferris Bueller's Day Off.

If God is all powerful, and Jesus is the son of God, why did He make His birthday fall on Christmas?

I don't mind being alone when I'm surrounded by people, I just hate being alone when I'm alone.

Every day is a gift. That said, I've gotten some pretty shitty gifts over the years.

Anything is possible if you believe in yourself, said the guidance counsellor, stifling a laugh.

I like to think of Doritos as emotional packing material to safeguard the feelings I've swallowed.