Can you have a seance to summon the ghost of a dead zombie?

The best part of chronic head lice is it takes away your fear of dying alone.

Whoever coined the phrase, killing two birds with one stone, not only hated birds but also thought we needed to conserve stones.

I bet when all the punctuation marks have a party, they quietly look at exclamation point's wife and think, that poor woman.

Although I love the taste of Nutrageous bars, I am nutraged at their new, high price.

It's been years since any hillbilly has reported getting sodomized by an alien. Did they break up and not tell us?

I was born an emotional tampon in a cauldron of dysfunction.