Love is like pancreatitis; it starts off slow, then builds in intensity until you become consumed and develop violent cramps.

I know that big, important things don't just come together overnight, but I've been me for a long time now and it's still not working.

One phrase you don't want kicking off your obituary is, Never, in the long history of bungee jumping.

Unshaven dudes in hoodies and ski caps look so hip and cool, until they too close to a grocery cart full of dented cans.

Catholic Church reasserts its moral authority on contraception: If God believed in birth control, altar boys would have a uterus.

59% of all suicides are actually botched murder-suicides performed by dyslexics.

A giant python was discovered in Florida. Spooky news for a state that derives half it's income from a giant mouse.