Cupcakes - when you want to watch your weight, but still feel the pride that comes with eating an entire cake.

People get into stand-up comedy by and large because they're smart and they have a perspective.

Take away the robots and the special effects, and Star Wars is just the simple story of a group of friends planning a terrorist attack.

I've never slept with a virgin, but I love breaking the seal on a new peanut butter.

The Elephant Man claimed his head was big because, it's so full of dreams. Actually, it's because his skull was shaped like a turkey.

If I masturbate while Googling myself, which part is more redundant?

A giant python was discovered in Florida. Spooky news for a state that derives half it's income from a giant mouse.