Whoever coined the phrase, killing two birds with one stone, not only hated birds but also thought we needed to conserve stones.
Dana GouldBecause of Bluetooth headsets, it's getting more and more difficult to tell who's schizophrenic and who's on a conference call.
Dana GouldIf anything, I believe that when I die, I will have to stand in front of all the children who went to bed hungry while I was on earth and read aloud a list of my eBay purchases. I shudder to think of it. Explaining to a poor child with a swollen belly why I didn't give his village fifty cents a week but spent twenty-seven dollars in a bidding war for a Mars Attacks coffee cup.
Dana Gould