I used to fear living a life untouched by God, but now, for some reason I've gone back to being afraid of cement mixers.
Dana GouldOur grocery store now has self-checkout, for your convenience. It's like getting punched in the throat, for your comfort.
Dana GouldBecause of Bluetooth headsets, it's getting more and more difficult to tell who's schizophrenic and who's on a conference call.
Dana GouldWhat if you died, and you found out that when you died, we all went to the same place. No Heaven, no Hell, doesn't matter what you did in life - you all go to the same place, regardless. I know a lot of nice people who will be really pissed off. You'll see Gandhi arguing with the doorman.
Dana Gould