I got mugged about six months ago. The oddest thing about the entire situation, though, was that I wasn't afraid, which is strange because basically I experience my life through two primary emotions: fear and suppressed fear.

Wrote a science fiction novel about a man who wins an argument with his wife, but it was rejected for being too farfetched.

Whenever someone starts a statement with, Let me tell you the kind of guy I am, that is a great time to start sawing your own head off.

Getting plastic surgery in your late 70's, it's kind of like painting your house as the fire approaches. Just die, there's no shame in it.

We come into this world naked, covered in our own blood, screaming in terror - and it doesn't have to stop there if you know how to live right

I can't wait for the day I learn to live in the now!

Always think twice before asking anything of anyone that ends in the words, on your face.