Wrote a science fiction novel about a man who wins an argument with his wife, but it was rejected for being too farfetched.

Every Thanksgiving we feed the homeless so they may join us as we celebrate other people finding a home.

Please don't let all the freak storms and climate change lead you to believe in freak storms and climate change.

In an effort to look cool, I am going to stop shouting Hey, you! at airplanes.

I would think, if you were horny enough, there'd come a time when it was hos before bros.

Love is like pancreatitis; it starts off slow, then builds in intensity until you become consumed and develop violent cramps.

There's something profoundly disturbing about watching an old guy eat a sandwich.