As I die, and my life flashes before my eyes, I want to see who made faces at me when I turned my head. That's all I want to see.
Dana GouldA great way to be left alone on the subway is to appear to be deep in conversation with a small knife.
Dana GouldIt's been years since any hillbilly has reported getting sodomized by an alien. Did they break up and not tell us?
Dana GouldEven if I say, Everyone in the village died of diarrhea, I still laugh a little after diarrhea.
Dana GouldWomen do it all the time to look younger and it would make perfect sense if one of them ever came out looking younger - but they don't. They just look the same; they all get plastic surgery face. No matter who they look like going in, they all come out looking like the girl from the band on 'The Muppet Show.
Dana Gould