Chihuahuas are the perfect pet if you don't have a person in your life who screams and shits their pants every time there's a noise.

Every day is a gift. That said, I've gotten some pretty shitty gifts over the years.

There's something profoundly disturbing about watching an old guy eat a sandwich.

The man who invented instant pudding was moved to action by an inability to wait for pudding.

Cupcakes - when you want to watch your weight, but still feel the pride that comes with eating an entire cake.

Since the dawn of time, primitive humans thought, loved and had poetry. They also pooped on everything. It was horrible.

Why do some bald guys grow ponytails? It it the same reason people too old to run always wear track shoes and sweat pants?