Where is the good will in the thought, I was going to throw this in the garbage, do you want to wear it?

I'll never be alone, because I'll always have My Problems with me!

One great way to mess with devout Christians and atheists would be if Jesus came back and said, By the way, you know I'm fake, right?

A lot of people are looking for their soul mates. Along the way, it's nice to bump into some genital pals.

I feel sorry for high school teams still named the Cougars. Now what does the coach say? Get out there and play like horny old ladies!

Christ was born in a manger, laying down amongst donkeys ang goats. He was given gifts of incense and perfume. No kidding.

I'm going to live until I die, and everything in between is just another excuse to eat peanut butter.