Comedy is immediate. Comedy is a solo mission. You're all by yourself, up there. And when you're in a film, on a set, it's a collaborative effort. It's about me being a tool for somebody else to create a story and a character from nothing, from their imagination.

When you are doing stand-up comedy, you are the writer, producer, director, sometimes bouncer.

The problem with dating a model is they won't go out with you if your cars color doesn't match their outfit.

There's estrogen running through my veins!

If you lie to a person at least tell someone else you've lied to the truth. It balances out your karma.

You have to learn the crowd. I just pay attention to them so I can make sure I can make them laugh.

You have to have a strong sense of humor to date me, and also know that you're probably going to be a part of the routine quite a bit.