In school I was pretty quiet. Kinda shy until my junior year. But at home I was a freak.

I say it with my tongue firmly planted in cheek but there's truth to it - being a comedian is very close to being a therapist. When you're working smaller clubs, you're listening. You're feeling an energy, you're going with a tone but when people start yelling out, you almost start a conversation with people.

You can't become tempted if you just give in a little quicker.

Video games don't make people go nuts. I played Super Mario forever. Not once hopping on a turtle or smash my head through a brick ceiling.

I'm not giving up on life. I'm giving up on today.

Why do they call it the restroom? Is there anybody just resting in this room?

When you are doing stand-up comedy, you are the writer, producer, director, sometimes bouncer.