I live my life like there's no yesterday.

I always thought that if I got no love at all early in my standup career, or I was god awful, I thought I'd get into psychology.

I have faith in all mankind. Well,not faith really, more like hopeful suspicion. And not "all" but 5 people. Mankind meaning computers.

I live my life like there's no yesterday.

True love is when you're cheating on a person but the thought of them still makes your eyes smile!

Anger has a way of seeping into every other emotion and planting itself in there.

What happens in Vegas, I'm telling everyone.