Ma'am, are you trying to molest me via drivethru?

Here's how you know that you're really drunk: when you get into a taxi cab and you think the fare is the time.

No one wants to drown. Drowning would be the worst. Cause everyone knows that feeling. That feeling, oh it's the worst... when you think you're drowning.

I think beating someone to death with a ukulele would just sound funny.

Sometimes, when a person gains a lot of success at a very young age, they become targets, and it's really easy to follow the crowds and not make independent decisions based on truly how you feel.

My professional dreams were coming true while I was living a personal nightmare.

Time machine... wouldn't you like to travel through time? I would. I'd go back... mess with people. You know what I would do? I would go back to when my mom and dad were having sex, to have me. Ya'know, come in, spank my dad on the ass I'm your son from the future! Ahaha!