I'm shooting a pilot based on my show. It's a one-camera show. I play myself.

Anger has a way of seeping into every other emotion and planting itself in there.

That MySpace is the story of the year. Everyone but my mother is on it.

I get so into the moment.

If you're drunk please don't drive. If you're on shrooms please don't think Walmart's a prison for bad clothing that needs help escaping.

What happens in Vegas, I'm telling everyone.

It was peace. Peace is when you would shake the hands of the people around you. And you knew peace was coming because the priest would say it five times rapid fire. He'd go, “My peace I leave, my peace I give to you. While we ate Reese's Pieces with the Lord. And I have a piece of lint in my peaceful eye"!