I don't write any of my material down. I like to improvise and be spontaneous.

I don't hate anyone. I simply block them out using hellish visions in a blind white rage. But if I see them out I'm pleasant.

Some people have constipation of the brain but their mouth has the runs.

There's estrogen running through my veins!

What happens in Vegas, I'm telling everyone.

You know your gut instincts are spot on about a person when you can also detect a water source in the soil beneath them.

I love hecklers. They remind you that you are a comedian.