I have a healthy disrespect for religion. I really do. When Columbus came to this country in 1492 he brought syphilis, diphtheria, tuberculosis, influenza and Christianity. The diseases were curable.

Win and you are the superior being in all the universe; lose, and may the fleas of a million rodents, infect your every orifice.

I lost 150 lbs. if you include my wife.

I adore dogs to the extent I think they are much more important than human beings. I like your dog much more than I like you.

I hunt feral hogs. I try not to shoot creatures. That doesn't do anything for me. But big, nasty, smelly, bristly things with tusks that destroy everything that they touch. Yeah, I'll shoot them.

I have a healthy disrespect for religion. I really do. When Columbus came to this country in 1492 he brought syphilis, diphtheria, tuberculosis, influenza and Christianity. The diseases were curable.

Never has my flabber been so completely gasted.