It's hard to have a career.

Whenever you get on the plane, the flight attendant will always tell you the name of your pilot. Like anyone goes, Oh, he's good.

It's hard for your mom to tell you she has an oral fixation and has to have something in her mouth. My step dad is in the kitchen winking at me. You down with OPP, yeah you know me. Exciting is and a special... What? Easy, and why do you know all the words? That's weird.

I can see getting married and having a family, because it is the next thing on the agenda. You can only do this for so long. I'm old, and my friends all have kids. And I'm single, still blow drying my hair!

It's great to tell people you have your own show, but that's where the fun stops.

I'm still blow drying my hair, just trying to keep doing stuff that's fun.

Horrible date all through high school and college. Here's an impression of me on a date in high school. Come on, chug it!