Whenever I'm on my computer, I don't type 'lol'. I type 'lqtm' - laugh quietly to myself. It's more honest.
I love Steven Wright.
The key to life is balance, especially if you are on a ledge.
I am what I eat. And I am this especially when I bite my nails.
My friend says touche way too much. He's a touche bag.
I wasn't the class clown, but I was starting to become the "crazy guy" at law school, which is the guy who is not so much "crazy" as "annoying."