One time I saw an old man in a hurry and I thought, 'That makes sense.'

Checkers taught me that a King is a man with another man on top of him. But life taught me that that's actually called a Queen.

Whenever I throw caution to the wind I make sure I'm facing the right way so that it doesn't blow back and hit me in my face.

Your mind is like a sponge, in the sense that it would come in handy when cleaning off a countertop or something like that.

A lot of things look cooler in slow motion. Eating isn't one of them.

I've learned something on the road, traveling around: state shapes. The easier it is to draw the shape of the state, the harder it is to live in that state. So, if you live in a regular polygon, get the hell outta there. You gotta move to a squiggly area. Culture's attracted to squiggles.

I have fun acting, and I want to do more of it, and I want to direct my own movie.