It is a little ironic that one thing a babysitter should not do is sit on a baby.

Planning trip around the globe, that is in my room.

The reason you often get in comedy is because you're not getting laid.

I am completely attracted to the idea of simplicity, or at least removing things that seem unnecessary when trying to get an idea out there.

I bought a dictionary. First thing I did was, I looked up the word "dictionary", and it said "you're an asshole".

I still like paper books. Like, book is a flammable object. After you read it, you could use it to get warm. Or it could become a pile of napkins.

I care about politics, but I have a tough time making comedy out of it. I was so happy to have a chance to be on The Daily Show, and I think Jon Stewart's so funny... but mostly in my own comedy, I care about less relevant things.