I wonder if, as a society, we will ever be able to call someone a jive tofurkey.
Vampire fad just won't die. Makes sense, I guess.
Automatic paper towel dispensers are a solution to something that was never a problem in the first place.
The definition of adventure depends upon how boring your life is.
A straw enables you to drink without using your wrist. A straw is your friend - until you lose eye contact with the straw. Then it will betray you and make you look like an idiot.
Having a beard is a good way to make your face more susceptible to velcro.