Clothing sizes are weird, they go: small, medium, large and then extra large, extra extra large, extra extra extra large. Something happened at large, they just gave up. They were like, 'I'm not doing any more adjectives; you just keep putting extras on there.' We could do better than that: small, medium, large, whoa, easy, slow down, stop it, interesting, American.

A power nap, is when you sleep on someone who's weaker than you

A glove is a very literal looking hand puppet.

It is interesting that the black BMW is the preferred car of so many assholes.

Never forget where you came from. That's what I think when I walk into a cave.

What's this about rice milk? I didn't even know rice had nipples!

Another term for balloon is bad breath holder.