Parades are man's attempt to make traffic exciting.
It would be interesting if Elvis were reincarnated as an Elvis impersonator.
I went whale watching once. It was very similar to watching people on a boat become disappointed.
You are ten times more likely to get hit by a car when the driver is aiming for you.
A human head looks the least scary when it is attached.
There's a very fine line between giving someone the Heimlich maneuver and dry-humping a stranger.