My original goal was just to do stand-up but then I became interested in films - writing a film, shooting one someday, and getting to act in them.

I'm not a lawmaker, but I was thinking that if you have a really loud ring tone, maybe you should be stabbed in the ear?

A lot of things look cooler in slow motion. Eating isn't one of them.

I didn't play music, nobody in my family had an instrument or played music, we didn't even have any books at my house. I think about it and I'm like, I don't know how I climbed out of there.

I was on the train the other day, and I heard somebody say, I'm really good at checkers. That's the same thing as saying, I'm not good at very many things.

The key to life is balance, especially if you are on a ledge.

A Rubik's cube is equal to a drag queen. It's really colorful, but I don't wanna do it.