Swimming is a confusing sport, because sometimes you do it for fun, and other times you do it to not die. And when I'm swimming, sometimes I'm not sure which one it is.
Parades are man's attempt to make traffic exciting.
Yes" actually means "No" 100% of the time, when the question is "Can I give you some advice?
When I am at rodeo I find it difficult not to root for the animals.
It is a little ironic that one thing a babysitter should not do is sit on a baby.
To get strangers to hate you even faster, crank up the volume on that very interesting ringtone of yours.