Have a great day. Note: does not apply to my enemies.

I think the most annoying language is a tie between all the ones I don't know how to speak.

When I first heard the term 'training bra,' I was freaked out. I was pretty young and I said, 'Did you just say training bra? They're training their chests? I had no idea.' See some lady, her boobs are everywhere. 'What's her deal?' Those are untrained titties.

Bowling would be more interesting if it were slightly uphill.

Why are there not positive mysteries? It's always who stole the diamond, or who killed the butler? How about... who made cookies, somebody cleaned my room.

My friend has hand soap that smells like coconut. It's nice. Unless your hands are dirty from coconuts.

I like to use 'I Can't Believe it's Not Butter' on my toast in the morning, because sometimes when I eat breakfast, I like to be incredulous. How was breakfast? Unbelievable.