I need to develop some patience - immediately.

Tic Tacs are the maracas of breath mints.

Whenever I see an autobiography for sale in the book store i just flip to the about the author section. I'm like, "Done, next!"

Conclusions are based in time. We live in time. So any definition of success is bound up with time. With other things you can say, "Can I yo-yo? Can I juggle?" Usually you have a pretty small window in which to get your answer. Stand-up is different. You can't do stand-up for one night and say, "Am I a funny stand-up comedian?" In two months or two years you'll start to realize it.

Another thing that I like and that's fun for me is to try and talk and play music at the same time, because I feel like I'm learning something. There are these little challenges built into it; it's a way to push myself a little bit more as a performer.

I was eating some candy and looked on the wrapper, and it said made from natural and artificial flavors. You could just say flavors.

I used to play sports. Then I realized you can buy trophies. Now I am good at everything.