I like to go to concerts because I love to see my favorite band through the phone of the asshole who's standing in front of me.
Demetri MartinI like to stand near ATM machines, and when somebody types in their pin number, I go, 'Got it!' And then I run away.
Demetri MartinWhen I dropped out [from a law school], everybody was disappointed... But I found that disappointing people is a good thing, because disapproval is freedom. Before that, I never realized how much I sought other people's approval. Once I figured that out, I was free to move on and seek the approval of other people, in comedy clubs and showbiz meetings.
Demetri MartinTo some I am known as Chief. And these are usually people who work in Radio Shack or try to sell me shoes. To others I am known as Buddy. These are people who dwell in bars and wonder if Iโve got a problem or what it is that I am โlooking at.โ And to still others, who are in that same bar, standing just off to the side, I am โGet Him!"
Demetri Martin