When watering your plants, try to talk to them - say something like, Hold it right there and then shoot them with water gun.

Vampire fad just won't die. Makes sense, I guess.

I was watching MTV and there were girls dancing in suspended cages. That would be an ambivalent situation: "I'm trapped! ...but enjoying the music".

A musical is the same as a burlap sack, I would not want to be in either

To be creative, first I need to be really organized. If my apartment's messy I need to clean it. It's like before you start doing your homework or studying for a test, you have to have a clean room.

If I had a bookstore I would make all the mystery novels hard to find.

I like birthdays. Every time someone is born, that's just like bringing more cake into the world.