The clothes make the man. The children working in sweatshops make the clothes. Therefore, the children working in sweatshops make the man.

It's hard to know what's gay in life. Boxing. That's two men fighting over a belt.

I know about Woodstock probably as much as your average person who is over 30, where I'd know Jimi Hendrix, Janis Joplin, Grateful Dead.

I do come across people who don't like me, don't like my comedy, don't think it's funny, it's too cutesy, or whatever they hate. And it's like, "Okay. That's your opinion. Somebody liked it, so that's good." Hopefully it balances out.

I like birthdays. Every time someone is born, that's just like bringing more cake into the world.

It is interesting that the black BMW is the preferred car of so many assholes.

There is also a beast, a beast of strange dimensions. He has the head of a horse and the body of a man who needs a lot of attention. He represents me in college: I was a dork-ataur.