And as far as actors go, Peter Sellers is my all-time favorite.

I like to stand near ATM machines, and when somebody types in their pin number, I go, 'Got it!' And then I run away.

Brought to you by raising your voice. The next best thing to being right.

The problem with my balloon collection is that people always think there's a party. Settle down. It's not a party. It's just balloons.

It's weird to make a decision where everyone in your life disapproves, pretty vocally and directly. They said, "You've got one year left. Just do it." I had a full scholarship so I didn't have to pay for it. They asked, "Why don't you just get the degree so you can have it?" And I said, "You don't understand. I was trying to figure out what I wanted to do and now I know. I have the answer and it's dumb to waste any more time."

Whenever I try to spell 'banana,' I feel stupid because I don't know when to end it.

Our Times, a Brief History: As televisions became flatter, People became rounder.