Leave no stone unturned in your quest to disrupt a rock garden.
I used to play sports. Then I realized you can buy trophies. Now I am good at everything.
I got into stand up just to do stand up because I love stand up.
A cool tattoo design is any drawing that would also look good saggy.
Whenever I'm on my computer, I don't type 'lol'. I type 'lqtm' - laugh quietly to myself. It's more honest.
I like shorter jokes. I like fewer words. I think the more ideas there are the, the fewer words there should be.