I didn't do improv in college, I never performed, I didn't do theater either. I was in student government, I was a history major.

A drunk driver is very dangerous. So is a drunk backseat driver if he's persuasive.

I'm a producer on my show, which is great, but it's also kind of a mixed blessing because there's so much responsibility. Everything is a decision. You have to worry about the money, you have to worry about daylight, who we're going to cast and if this location doesn't work out, what are we going to do?

Man is the most powerful creature on the planet. And we're arrogant. I mean, people own birds. It's like, there's a creature with the gift of flight. I want it. I'm going to put it in my kitchen and make it crap on old information.

It's always helpful to remember that in the grand scheme of things you are much more important than... um, wait, than... something, maybe.

I like playing frisbee. It is the only sport where you can throw something at a person and it's okay.

Americans who do not celebrate Independence Day: pets.