I like playing frisbee. It is the only sport where you can throw something at a person and it's okay.

Use crazy glue and nails to turn a rocking chair into just a chair that looks like a rocking chair.

I like birthdays. Every time someone is born, that's just like bringing more cake into the world.

If you are trying to impress a woman, leave any sort of show farting out of the equation.

Swimming is a confusing sport, because sometimes you do it for fun, and other times you do it to not die. And when I'm swimming, sometimes I'm not sure which one it is.

My original goal was just to do stand-up but then I became interested in films - writing a film, shooting one someday, and getting to act in them.

Some of them relate to farts but they are not fart jokes. They would just be a fart in the joke but it's about something else.