A drunk driver is very dangerous. So is a drunk backseat driver if he's persuasive.

I like playing frisbee. It is the only sport where you can throw something at a person and it's okay.

And of course I didn't make any money from stand up for years, so I had temp jobs. That was the way I made money.

I don't want to be my own boss. I want to be my own colleague.

The shortest feedback loop I can think of is doing improvisation in front of an audience.

I want to get the joke to work without having to put any words or to say anything. I just want the person to look at it, and quietly in their brain, they can just put it together and say, "Cool, that one works".

There's a very fine line between giving someone the Heimlich maneuver and dry-humping a stranger.