I've often liked a girl, made her laugh, and thought she liked me, and then found out that she didn't like me that way. I've definitely done time in the friend zone.

I've never read an article of clothing.

If you stretched the average person's intestines out from end to end, it would make them scream a lot.

Skiing is my favorite sport, because, that's the only sport that is actually better to watch the worst the person is at it. "That guy won a gold medal in the Olympics" "Oh yeah, that's cool, i wanna watch the fat guy" "Come on dude, you can take that hill"

One of my favorite clothing patterns is camouflage. Because when you're in the woods it makes you blend in. But when you're not it does just the opposite. It's like, 'Hey, there's an asshole.'

Halloween's my favorite holiday because you don't have to spend it with your family.

I'm a body builder, but I don't use weights. I use snacks. It's kind of a different building process.