It's very easy to go through your whole life and never really get anything done or have any real meaningful interactions or relationships. All of a sudden you're dead, and I'm going to say that's got to be a letdown.

One thing I learned is that it's never OK to walk through a cemetery dressed as a mummy - even if that was a shortcut on the way to the costume party.

Okay, so, when I was a kid, definitely the drawings and the illustration. Then I stopped in sixth grade or so. And then I started again when I was in my twenties. I really didn't progress since then, so the way I draw is the way I drew in sixth grade.

Your mind is like a sponge, in the sense that it would come in handy when cleaning off a countertop or something like that.

And of course I didn't make any money from stand up for years, so I had temp jobs. That was the way I made money.

A pipe is greater than a bong. Because when you're smoking a pipe at least it makes you look like you're thinking about something.

Sometimes I see a bird fly by and I feel jealous. But then other times I see a bird fly into a closed window and I feel laughing.