When I stub my toe it's like I pressed a button that plays all the curse words I know.
A power nap, is when you sleep on someone who's weaker than you
I think since I was kid people told me that they thought I was funny.
Palindromes are the number one conversation stopper, like party killer, I think I've ever seen.
Let no man's deathbed be a futon.
I think one of the most groundbreaking inventions of all time is the jackhammer.