I feel so fortunate to be one of the lucky ones who is so grateful and appreciative to know such great synonyms for thankful.

I have never been in a bad mood and near a beach ball at the same time. Causation? Correlation? Or fate?

I don't have to kill myself, time is going to do that.

I saw a dog wearing a sweater and I thought that looked ridiculous 'cause dogs don't have arms. If you're going to put clothes on the dog, you should put two pairs of pants on it.

I am the Walrus, but not the one you're probably thinking of. I am the other Walrus, the one who is less the Walrus in the sense of legendary music and more the Walrus in the sense of his tendency to to lie around in places for too long.

The digital camera is a great invention because it allows us to reminisce. Instantly.

100% of the people who give 110% do not understand math.