How many of you are creative? I don't know, but for me, when you make a bunch of things over time and then you keep them... you forget. I look through my sketchbooks and I'm an audience for myself.

Artistically, I find jokes really satisfying aesthetically, because there's something great about getting an idea down to a sentence or two.

It would be nice if people said, God bless you not just when you sneezed but also when you farted.

Halloween: the day each year when strangers give you even more specific reasons to dislike them based on what they are wearing.

It feels like every day or two, people on Twitter and the Internet are outraged about something.

Statistics indicate that the average American is a guy named Brian who lives in Ohio.

There are jokes I know I want to tell, and there's sort of a rough order, but usually I try to change it up every show, to improvise and talk with the audience. I think when you tell jokes, if you're not careful, you can end up telling the whole list of jokes and then that's it. And that can get a little boring.