I like when people wear a WWJD bracelet, because it's like an example of the first thing Jesus wouldn't do, probably.

I never set out to do a sketch show.

Sometimes it looks like I'm dancing, but it's just that I walked into a spider web.

Whenever I throw caution to the wind I make sure I'm facing the right way so that it doesn't blow back and hit me in my face.

The earth without art is just eh.

I just found out that I have more allies than America!

If you really think about it, hitting the snooze button in the morning doesn't even make sense. It's like saying, 'I hate getting up in the morning-so I do it over... and over... and over again.'