I think a bad place for a fire would be the factory where they make those trick candles.

Our Times, a Brief History: As televisions became flatter, People became rounder.

'Sort of' is such a harmless thing to say... sort of. It's just a filler. Sort of... it doesn't really mean anything. But after certain things, sort of means everything. Like... after "I love you"... or "You're going to live."

Right before I'm about to talk at length about something I like I say, Get me started.

Knights would have probably liked refrigerator magnets.

It's Thursday and it really feels like a Thursday. Sometimes things just work out.

I went whale watching once. It was very similar to watching people on a boat become disappointed.