I tend to avoid televisions, politics, and places with velvet ropes.
The easiest time to add insult to injury is when you're signing somebody's cast.
A lot of people don't like bumper stickers. I don't mind bumper stickers. To me a bumper sticker is a shortcut. It's like a little sign that says 'Hey, let's never hang out.'
Glitter is the herpes of craft supplies.
Specifically in stand-up, I love jokes. I love short, structured ideas and a punchline.
It seems that two of the most basic forms of comedy are jokes and stories. And, of course, they are not mutually exclusive.