Let no man's deathbed be a futon.

The problem with most people, is that they are most people.

I wonder if, as a society, we will ever be able to call someone a jive tofurkey.

I like when people wear a WWJD bracelet, because it's like an example of the first thing Jesus wouldn't do, probably.

I'm in a weird position, because I like rainbows, but I'm not gay. So whenever I go out wearing a rainbow shirt, I have to put "Not gay." But I'm not against gays, so under that I'll have to put "... but supportive." It's weird how one group of people took refracted light. That's very greedy, gays.

The Pursuit of Happiness: It sure seems to like a good chase, doesn't it?

I just listen to so much music that I like the role music can play in scoring something. I'm not doing song parodies or funny songs, I'm just adding some music to my words. So it's limited and specific, but as a performer I find it pretty enjoyable.